I Still Believe Humor Is The Best Medicine

 This is a
re-Post
of my
June 15th, 2015
Post
called
Just Joking Around.
I still believe humor is the best medicine.

*****
Recently, I went into one of those discount massage parlors.

It turned out to be self serve!

Then I met this hooker on a street corner.

She told me she had a headache!

If it wasn't for the guy who just pick-pocketed me,

I'd have no sex life at all!

I blame it all on my upbringing when I was a child.

When I took my first step, my Dad tripped me!

When I was born, the doctor slapped my Mom!

Then, I think I was still a virgin at the age of thirty-three,

I was making love to this girl I was dating and she started crying.

I asked, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?"

She said, "No, I hate myself now!"

One night I thought I was going to get really lucky.

I had these two girls in my car and they both scream at the same time,
"Stop here!" Right next to the International House of Pancakes was a
Motel 6.

We went inside, and I had to pay for two
"Rooty Tooty Fresh N Fruity"
meals!

Then I started dating this girl who was half-black.

She dumped me because she said I was prejudiced.

In a sweet moment, I called her half-white!

When I got married, I asked my wife if I could give her a goodnight kiss on her cheek.

She bent over!

I did meet a famous Politician once.

I met the Surgeon General, and he offered me a cigarette!

I believe in this World, every person has a soul mate.

And if I ever find mine, my wife will kill her!

People say I look a lot younger than I really am.

That's because I act so immature!

This is,
Those Last Two Jokes I Wrote,
Jim Hauenstein,

And,

“Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
- Paul Terry -

That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

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