Now Boys & Girls, Today's Word Is Phallus

Do you know what is really embarrassing?

When a child walks into a room

and sees his

Parents

watching

Pornography.

This happened to me the other day.

The thing is with my

Parents,

I didn't know they knew how to hack my webcam at my home,

so they could watch me!

“Poor Old fool,”

thought the well-dressed gentleman,

 as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub.

So he invited the old man inside for a drink.

As they sipped their whiskeys,

the gentleman thought he’d humor the old man

and asked,

“So how many have you caught today?”

The old man replied,

“You’re the eighth.”

"So there was this dyslexic guy who walked into a bra."

I bought one of those tapes to teach you Spanish in your sleep.

During the night,

the tape skipped.

So now I can only stutter in Spanish.

I was in small-claims court when I listened in on the case of a woman who held a good job but still had trouble paying her bills on time.

“Can’t you live within your income?”

asked the judge.

“No, Your Honor,”

she said.

“It’s all I can do to live within my credit.”

I woke up frighten out of my wits this morning.

So I went directly to the

Emergency Room.

When the doctor came in to see me,

I excitedly asked,

"Look at my phallus Doc. Why is it the color orange?"

He looked at me thoughtfully

and asked,

"Now that you are retired, what do you do all day?"

I thought about it

and said,

"I watch pornography and eat Cheetos."

This is,

Now Boys & Girls,

Today's Word Is Phallus,

[fal-uh s],

In Anatomy It Means,

On The Male - ?#n!$,

On The Female - <(!tor^$,

Jim Hauenstein,

And,

“Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.”
- Dave Barry -

That is my story and I am sticking to it!

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The San Diego Doctor Who Con Is Happening Right Now As I Speak!